Gotta Chill Out

I have really been bugging. I found out that one of the directors on a film I was working on was having a private screning. I called him once while in Nashville and once on Tuesday trying to see if I could come and possibly invite some people. He said that he'd rather I didn't invite anyone, and he'd rather that I waited. I bugged out, and kinda argued my way into this special showing. My friends Nick, Denna, and Paul put me on blast. They said I was being pushy and I need to be patient. I argued that I've been working and I've been patient. They said I have to keep being patient. They said that I could damage my reputation around Memphis. I called my boy Ennis, he said I was being bratty. I called the guy on Wednesday, apologized, and said that I would not show up. He called me today, said he appreciated my call, and said that it was up to me. Then, I almost shot off again. I had received a copy of the 48 Hour Film Project movie. I was about to send it to everybody I knew. Fortunately, the homegirl Arnita (Westwoood!) called to remind me about a shoot on Thursday. I told her that I was about to send this to everybody. She said, "Do you think that Arnold wants to put it in other festivals?" I said, "Hey, good point." I then called Jarrod, who returned my call the next day. He said that, for now, send it to close family and friends. I knocked my list down to about thirteen people. Mom, Big Bro, Denna, Paul, Nick, Rod, etc. Some have complained of no sound. If more complain, I will look into that. The main point is, my obsession is out of control. I am losing myself, and when I lose myself, I become selfish and arrogant. I have to get back in church and make sure that I do at least one non-filmmaking activity a week. Like, going to the movies, museums, concerts, something. I need balance. Thank God for my friends, though. They will tell me when I'm tripping. It hurts, but I appreciate that, though. Be easy.